So for a while I've known that now that I'm eighteen, at the end of the school year my dad is no longer required to pay child support. But I just learned that he has no intentions of helping me with college or college tuition (which for the college I've been accepted to so far is upwards of $30,000). He acts as if he's being pressed for money, as if paying child supports was making a huge dent in his pocket. First of all my mom only got like $5,000 a year to support me and second of all according to the 2006-2007 FAFSA he makes more than three times what my mom makes. He complains about not having any money but then turns around and buys an Audi to replace his old car. Did he think "Hey if I get an older model or a little less flashy of a brand than I'll have enough money remaining to get Jordan a decent used car at a reasonable price" No, and now he complains when I need a ride to wherever (although he complains comfortably with leather seats, a wood dashboard, 6 disk CD changer, Satellite radio that identifies the artist playing, a sun roof and an ultra turbo engine).
He likes to take credit for our (Cole and My) accomplishments, brag about how Cole's in the Nutcracker and Jordan's going to Morocco, show us off at family reunions but doesn't like shelling out anything to make those things possible. If it was up to him I would getting an online degrees from some unaccredited backwoods university. If it was up to him neither of us would be learning how to play instruments. If it was up to him Cole wouldn't be in ballet and if it was up to him we probably wouldn't have been born. But we were and whether he regrets it or not he needs to own up to the fact that his role in life has become that of a father and like it or not that means spending more than what's court appointed.
He likes to only have to take part in the fun times, when for example we went to England, Whales and Paris. I had been saving up for years, working at festivals, slinging sausages at Schmidt's, days of scorching hot sun, days of tart smelling sauerkraut and blasting polka. After years of work I was still about $1,000 short . On a whim I invited him to chaperon the trip (I was with Girls Scouts) thinking that he would turn it down, but he snatched up his opportunity and shelled out his full trip expense in one check. While my mom had to scrape the bottom of her pocket book to pay the remaining of my trip fee. She was the one who helped me peddle sausages at the State Fair, not him. He got all of the reward with none of the struggle and though we enjoyed the trip thoroughly, it's times like this when I am in desperate need for college money and he refuses to help out, that I wish he hadn't come. I wish he would stop trying to play the role of a father and just be one.
Well, until next time...
*looking at this journal in retrospect I'm kind of ashamed. My dad isn't all bad or even mostly bad, he's just... my dad. So I'm going to leave this post as a testament to my frustration but keep in mind that everyone has their follies and that through the good and bad times my dad's been there, to help me through them.
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1 comment:
my dad is very similar. he hates our house, but refuses to fix it up. he says he doesn't care how things look, but complains whenever my mom makes a change. it's ridiculous. whenever he says he doesn't have money, he goes out and buys something fancy, too. one year, he spent all of our tax return money on motorcycles and drums. it's unfair. i need my ceiling fixed in my room. he only cares about himself.
wow. sorry about that rant.
I know this sounds super cliche, but you are a very intellegent person and everything will work out. really.
ps. you spelled wales wrong. :)
i think whales would be better, though.
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